Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I can read

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

Why are people of mixed race seen as more attractive than non-mixed-race people?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

Was Daenerys' downfall inevitable after she left Meereen in Game of Thrones?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

What is the best way to get my wife to become a hotwife?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

How did you cope when someone you love, dealing with hyper-independence and trauma, felt they needed space to heal alone? Were you able to support them without overstepping, and did you eventually reconnect? How did that journey unfold?

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I know who the president of Turkey really is

How has your life changed since starting college?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

What are some things that children used to wait for, but are no longer common in today's society?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

What are some alternatives to wearing a bra? Why do some women feel pressure to wear bras even though there may not be any benefits?

I don’t cotton to rapists

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

Have you ever had a secret crush on anyone?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I actually pay taxes

I don’t buy bullshit

Corey Conners withdraws from U.S. Open after injury striking camera cable - Awful Announcing

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

Why do flat-Earthers think the Earth is flat?

I have a reading level above third grade

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

Is LGBTQ destroying the world?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I can count

How Many Burgers Are Too Many Burgers? Here's What Health Experts Advise. - HuffPost

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I have complete contempt for fakery

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I see through liars

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.